Comments on: Take Your Kid To Work Day http://www.52stories.net/issue-114/take-your-kid-to-work-day/ Every picture tells a story. What's yours? Fri, 04 Jul 2008 02:38:26 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3 By: DanielleM http://www.52stories.net/issue-114/take-your-kid-to-work-day/#comment-455 DanielleM Wed, 17 Oct 2007 00:22:31 +0000 http://www.52stories.net/issue-114/take-your-kid-to-work-day/#comment-455 Well done, I like how this story worked with the picture prompt very much. A question -- is Greg's job really a legal one? (Repo man?) and if so would the bike rider be a "mark"? (Maybe that is proper repo-man terminology, I'm not sure -- it just made me wonder as the reader if the father was lying to the son about his job, and if he was really stealing the bike...) Well done, I like how this story worked with the picture prompt very much. A question — is Greg’s job really a legal one? (Repo man?) and if so would the bike rider be a “mark”? (Maybe that is proper repo-man terminology, I’m not sure — it just made me wonder as the reader if the father was lying to the son about his job, and if he was really stealing the bike…)

]]> By: John http://www.52stories.net/issue-114/take-your-kid-to-work-day/#comment-419 John Thu, 11 Oct 2007 19:46:42 +0000 http://www.52stories.net/issue-114/take-your-kid-to-work-day/#comment-419 Scott- This was nicely told in general. I cringe a little at the 'da' instead of 'the' from the dad... maybe another way to give him the accent. Even using it a little more might help. "They stashed the bike in the van a block away, then found another, more out of the way spot to wait" confused me -- I thought they found another bike, or van... I did like the dad's response to "He'll see us" - very realistic handling between father and son, and a good answer to the question. Scott-
This was nicely told in general. I cringe a little at the ‘da’ instead of ‘the’ from the dad… maybe another way to give him the accent. Even using it a little more might help.

“They stashed the bike in the van a block away, then found another, more out of the way spot to wait” confused me — I thought they found another bike, or van…

I did like the dad’s response to “He’ll see us” - very realistic handling between father and son, and a good answer to the question.

]]>